DEER!!!

Yesterday I took the kids to Presque Isle even though it was raining. Sophia sang, Rain Rain go away, the whole way there and it worked!! It stopped raining when we got there and didn't start again until we were done walking around the island. We were in search of deer and the first half of the walk we didn't see any. I was pretty sure we wouldn't either since the city took most of the deer out of there. But as we were walking Sophia started yelling, "mom deer, mom deer!" I said, "no hun there aren't any deer." Then of course I looked over and BAM four deer were standing right next to us! I could almost touch one. We kept trying to get it to come closer but it just stood there, even Olivia was calling to it. That really made the girl's day seeing those deer lol kids are so funny.

pregnancy blues

When I was pregnant with Sophia and Olivia I never cried about how I looked or that I was gaining weight. I was just so proud to be pregnant and loved everything good and bad that came with it.

This pregnancy is different...

I cry every time I go to get dressed and can't find anything to wear (I'm in the weird size stage) My maternity is too big and normal stuff too small. I cry when I look in the mirror and see the stringy hair and pale face, and the double chin that is already starting to show it's ugly self.

I don't think it helps that people keep making comments either. WOW you're showing? or is that just chub? Well yes at 13 and a half weeks I am showing and alot!! My baby is already measuring big (they all did) I can't help that I give birth to 6 month olds!!! haha yes they are pretty big babies at birth.

It's not even the bump that makes me cry....I LOVE my bump! It's the huge love handles that are just flapping over my pants :(  I swear they have tripled in size since I got preggo!
The other day Jeremy says,"hun you're not fat, you're having a baby." I replied, "the baby isn't growing out of my sides!"
 I didn't look so flabby with my other two children and even after, my body seemed to bounce back pretty fast.

This has been a very weepy pregnancy. I cry over...
food

clothes

my children

thinking about the girl's birth

my hair

my pale skin

if Jeremy seems annoyed or unhappy in any little way

just about everything!!!

I really can't wait until I get to the stage, that's my favorite!!

what an honor!

On Mother's day a man in our church asked if he could speak with Jeremy and I. I wasn't very sure what he wanted to talk about, see Jeremy has been helping this man out through the addiction program at our church. He has turned out to be such a nice guy and is really getting his life back together. Jeremy has gone to court with this man many times (as the director of RU) to be a voice for this man so he could get his kids. He has really changed since we first met him a year ago. He has sobered up, never misses church and is a big help around the church, has a job, and is now helping others at our addiction program.

 Well back to the question he wanted to ask us.....He said he had prayed a lot about this and talked to the pastor about it and he wanted to know if Jeremy and I would be the ones to take his boys and raise them if anything happens to him. He said our home is the kind of him he would want his kids raised in and he couldn't think of anyone else he would rather have take care of his kids! Of course we aren't expecting anything to happen to him but still it was such an honor to be ask this. He is getting all the legal stuff together so it will be in his will or whatever.

With all the doubts I have about being a good enough mom (mostly put there by others) and all the criticism I have had from others about my children (mostly from people without kids) This really made me happy to think that someone wants ME to raise their kids if anything happened to them.

 I am so proud to say, I am a good mother who is raising her children to love God, church, and others. I might not be perfect but God has made me who I am. I am very honored to have someone else think so too.